Questions from Readers

Helen-British Columbia: I am 80 years old and am losing confidence; I understand this is a natural process. Making decisions has always been a problem with me but it seems to be getting more difficult.
The Communicators: Hello, Helen, we welcome you. For some time you have had a fear of being out by yourself. This has caused you to feel somewhat isolated since you have begun to limit your activities in favor of the safety of your home. Helen, the fear that you are pushing aside is the belief that you can not fend for yourself. Helen, the time has come when you need more of a support team around you. You need to create a situation in which you are in closer contact with the people that you care about. This is the reassurance that you are seeking. By shifting your current living situation you can open up many more possibilities for yourself. You are, by nature, very curious and you like to see and do new things. By creating a more secure base for yourself you will begin to feel free again to explore new things. What you see as your inability to make decisions stems from your basic discomfort with not feeling fully supported emotionally and physically. By creating a support team you will be able to shift this discomfort.

Lois from NYC: I keep having dreams about friends who have died (including my dog) and more recently people who are not really dead but are dead in the dream. My dreams don’t scare me; they just happen.

The Communicators: Hello, dear one, we welcome you. That which you are inquiring about at this time is related to the many changes that are taking place in your life. That which “was” is no longer and that which “is” seems like a reflection of yesterday and, yet, it is not. These dreams are a way for you to adjust to the many changes that are unfolding in your life. That which you are facing is the acceptance of what you often see as unbelievable or “too good to be true.“ You feel that which you have been given may be snatched from you and that which you love will be taken from you. At the same time, you are being shown that even the ones you believe have been taken from you have not really left you. The greater theme for you, Lois, is about acceptance in all areas of your life. Know that you can accept joy, that you can accept happiness, and that you can accept being acceptable. All of this is available to you. You are walking on new ground, now, and this will often leave you in a slight state of confusion, for this ground is unfamiliar and it may bring up feelings of apprehension about moving forward too quickly. We encourage you to take large steps. You are ready to come forth in your fullness.

Mark from NYC: Is it possible to change the criteria that attract one to a prospective romantic love partner, and if so, how?

The Communicators: Hello, dear one. That which you ask comes from your need to make right what you believe you did wrong. First, we must clarify that the path you have walked thus far, in terms of romance, has been one that has be sorely needed by you. Each romantic encounter has brought you a gift which you would not have otherwise experienced. We understand that the gift, at times, has been painful to digest and has caused you to accumulate feelings that sex, wild passion, love, security, independence and home can not exist together. In short, you have developed a split in your thinking that romance can only happen in a vacuum and that home and family look a different way. At this stage of your life you want to go beyond that which you have experienced in the past. You want to get it right. We must tell you that you have always gotten it right, for that was the exact experience that you needed to have at that particular time. Your relationships with women are your supreme place of learning. You greatest growth has come through women and it will continue to be so. Changing the criteria for romance is totally non-existent for one is always attracted to that which he believes he needs to feel complete. That which shifts over time is the individual. As you feel more complete and whole within yourself, the natural selection process will shift. When there are gaps in the sense of wholeness, an individual seeks that which he feels will fill those gaps. What soon becomes apparent is those gaps easily become inflamed by the outside energy and that which seemed like a perfect fit is now quite uncomfortable. The encounter has brought to light the valleys of pain that are within and that is the gift you were given from this relationship. You now have an opportunity to heal those gaps. Once you have healed, there is no longer a reason to duplicate that sort of relationship. So, naturally, your criteria for a romantic partner will shift. You will continue to do this as long as you need to. Some people require many multiple partners to accomplish this; others may do it was only a few. Dear one, you are on the right track for you. You have done it perfectly for you. Your curiosity is high at this time and you are seeking answers to questions that have no answers. That which will give you the greatest joy is to put your mind aside and to simply use your intuition as your compass.

Laurie from NYC: Now that I am completing my schooling and ordination, what guidance can
you give me so that I may be of greater service in the world?

The Communicators: Laurie, you have done quite a fine job of moving through the areas of resistance that have kept you locked into yesterday; much has unfolded in a relatively short time. These many changes have not been fully integrated into your energetic makeup. You are currently completing the details of your day-to-day activities for school. It will take several months for you to fully process and incorporate the magnitude of this experience into you daily life. There is a part of you that is still holding “it” at a distance. You feel a gap between the “you” that you have been and the “you” that you are becoming. Again, it is the full integration that has not been completed. Dear one, you see the “new you” as another species and you can’t quite figure out what to do with her. We invite you to simply allow the process to take its own course and give it the time that it needs. You are anxious to “get on with things” and yet this is a time when you need to savor all your experiences and allow Laurie to become familiar with her new self. Right now, time is needed for completion, integration and becoming friends with the new Laurie. She is quite a delight and there are so many new and wonderful things that she wants to do and will do. She is like a new born and is not quite ready for the big world. We say to you, give her lots of love and time to grow and she will do just fine.